Things you learn when your husband is a magician

1. Card tricks cause cards to be left in denim pockets.
2. Said pockets sometimes don’t get emptied before being washed.
3. Cards when wet in the washer break apart, become wet smudges, and stick to clothes horribly
4. These wet smudged former cards don’t shake off easily, and make a mess on the carpet.
5. Globs of these wet cards, when falling off, are attractive to 11-month olds.
6. When shaking the clothes off, they also stick to you, your clothes, causing you to have to change your outfit.
7. Old vacuums don’t suck the cards up so much as they become ‘stuck’ and cause your vacuum to stop sucking things up,making the house smell like burnt rubber.
8. My 11-month old is afraid of my upstairs vacuum, causing her to crawl screaming from me.
9. I hate my husband’s new passion.