Ants Bite the Big One

by Lisa Douglas

If you were on Twitter last night, you might’ve seen my spazzy tweet regarding my poor toddler.
Yes, I said 100s. (We were actually told later 150+)

She was out in our back yard, doing what she always does, inspecting life, squatting, spying, checking things out. For all we know, she could’ve been deciding to poop right that second, we’ll never know. What we did know is that, whatever she was originally doing caused her to seemingly sit in a big, angry ant pile. Her shrieks told the tale immediately. Her ankles, thighs, then hands, all swarmed with ants biting at her.

The above is the inside of her left thigh, after the meds. Her ankles are much much worse. C-O-V-E-R-E-D.

The scariest part about it was how fast it blew up, and how one bite’s swelling connected with others, and she was just one big swollen bite on her legs, it was that bad. And the hives, OHMYGOD the hives were EVERYWHERE!! She sneezed, and sneezed, and kept digging at her scalp. It seemed, despite not being bit 100% on her body, whatever wasn’t bit became covered by horrible hives. Her eyes were bloodshot and also itchy, it was like the venom from the ants just invaded her body and made her skin crawl with itchiness. She just kept digging into her ears, like they were in there too (and I was SO scared) and the second she said her mouth hurt (we thought swelling of her throat/tongue, or worse, they went in there, too) out the door he went with her, rushing her to the ER.

Leaving me behind.

I am not good being the one staying behind. At all. I’m the worrier to begin with. I can’t sit idly by, patiently waiting for news. It was TORTURE! I went immediately into panic mode. I sobbed. I called my mother. I sobbed some more. I went on a cleaning frenzy (I’m lucky anything got done the way I was shaking). I threw up. I called him maniacally to find out if there were any updates. Mostly, I was a friggin’ nervous wreck.

(By the way, thanks to all of you who prayed and kept us in your thoughts. I appreciate it so so much!)

And to you ants that decided to feast on my daughter yesterday, despite the fact that we stomped on, squished and smacked you all off my daughter, your days are numbered, should you have survived our thrashing. We’re so onto you like white on rice, it ain’t even funny. Pack your little ant-bags, now, ‘cuz I’m going to take a lot of pleasure seeing your demise tomorrow. {cue Wicked Witch of the West evil theme music}

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