Anti-Candida Diet from H-e-l-l

I wish I could sit here and tell you how WONDERFULLY I’m doing on this anti-candida diet, how marvelously LIFE-CHANGING this has been for me, how purging all the sugar and carbs from my diet has made me feel like a NEW WOMAN.

But it hasn’t. Not yet, anyway. Right now, it totally sucks.

I’m assured I’ll start to feel better soon, that right now I’m just “cleansing” the crap out, but to be honest? I feel like I’m starving. Nothing seemingly fills me up. I’m shaky, hot/cold, I feel faint and weak. I had no idea how much carbs and sugar were powering me through life until I cut them out – completely out. I knew I loved my carbs, but HOLY WOW apparently so did my body!

I spent the better part of Saturday shopping at Costco and Whole Foods and the better part of Sunday watching football and baking things with almond and coconut flour. I wish I could say my first foray into that was a success, but it wasn’t. These recipes will need LOTS of tweaking. Hoping to find successes to post for you, soon.

And for the love of all that is holy, can someone please come and hand-hold me on how to make my own mayonnaise? GAH!! I want to make chicken and egg salad and I suck so hard at blendering, it seems. Emulsifying is NOT my strong suit, it seems.

I know this uproar is temporary. I know this phase will pass and I’ll be better soon. But it’s hard to find solace in ANYTHING when you’re snacking on cardboard, like this:

This dry and crumbling blob was supposed to be a zucchini bread. Fail.

These were supposed to be anti-candida cookies. They are freakin’ cinnamon-y BALLS of dryness. Bleh.

These pancakes aren’t bad at all, but considering pancakes are meant to be used with syrup, and that’s all my body is seemingly yearning for, they feel dry to me, even if they are tasty.

Thankfully, I didn’t suck at making these Coconut Balls. These are the best things in my world right now.

I’m not supposed to have coffee. I bought this Chicory Root stuff from Whole Foods, and it tasted like booty. No bueno. So I caved. I’m drinking a little coffee still. I have to. If I don’t, I can’t even drag myself around the house :/

I plan on updating you all weekly as to how I’m doing on this diet, and the changes I’m experiencing, in hopes of helping others. Here’s to hoping next week’s update will be a much happier, less crazed one. And that I’ll have found something magic to help me in the baking department.