When you’re in college, you go through that self-discovery phase – who am I? What am I doing on this Earth? What am I going to be when I grow up? Am I ready to take on the world?
I loved my college campus, sitting underneath the beautiful trees, soaking up the sun, reading a book on a blanket with a snack or two, and fully absorbing the “college experience.” But what was I doing there? What would I do with the rest of my life? What woman was I to become?
One day, I remember wandering aimlessly through a local bookstore in town, letting my gut steer me towards something, anything, nothing – I was there with a purpose. That’s when I found SARK‘s Succulent Wild Woman sitting so colorfully on the shelf. The watercolor intrigued me, it used to be one of my most favorite painting mediums. I picked it up, purchased it, strolled happily to my favorite tree, set out a blanket, and cracked open the binding for the first time with a drink in hand. I didn’t move for two hours.
It became my bible all through college.
I have been struggling lately with postpartum depression, feeling those all-too-familiar feelings of self-doubt. Am I good mother? What am I doing here? Am I good wife? Why is this so hard?
I needed to reach out and open the cover of this book recently to rediscover with my own eyes the inspiration before me. Even when there’s absolutely nothing wrong in your life, your gorgeous children are all healthy, you have a perfect newborn, a roof over your head, food in the fridge, it can all be too overwhelming – life. responsibility. chores. breathing. – when you’re in the throes of postpartum depression.
I needed new eyes with which to see my life. This book gave me back my eyes again.
My book has aged since I purchased it, chock-full of crinkles and coffee stains (ahem), but all of my answers then are still before me, now, written in a way I can understand in my stressed out mind, in a book I’ve owned since 1997 when it was first written. Life affirmations, boldly painted before me. Right. There.
My college bible has now morphed into my mom bible, and my blogging bible. I thought I might share a few of my favorite journaly-slash-blogging parts with you, in hopes that it helps you, too. Indulge with me.
This one particularly hits home. I used to be afraid to do things alone, always wanting to be surrounded by friends or family. In a lot of ways, I still am that little girl still afraid. But I took my own spring break trip alone in 1998, inspired by SARK’s words. And now? With writing/blogging, I travel alone often, and I’m no longer afraid. In fact, I welcome it. It’s inspiring, empowering, refreshing, and nowhere near as hard as I used to imagine it was. Do the things that scares you.
There are so very many more gems in this book, about life, love, womanhood, and being an artist, a writer, a friend. I ENCOURAGE you to purchase this book and check it out, or visit PlanetSark.com, SARK’s website (which I am so happy exists! Ahh!)
What inspires you?